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Let's try something a little different. ("The Hunt for Good RPS")
Leather Daddy
No, this isn't an admin notice, don't worry!

Leather Daddy is having some technical difficulties that are keeping her from the RPS. I'll get to these stories soon, I swear!

BTW: If you recommend a long archive of stories and you don't specify that "fic #______ is the one that will change your life and your way of thinking, but fics x, y, and z are necessary backstory so you have to read them first," it's hard for me to see a list of 20 related stories and go, "oh boy, time to read them all!" Give me a hand, here. I want to be fair, but if you don't focus my reading, I'll use the time-honored "stick a fork in 3-5 places, see if it's done" technique. Which may indeed lead me to miss that "FIC THAT WILL ROCK MY WORLD," but I had no idea which fic that was!

Editorial comment #1: I have the greatest respect for you authors (um...usually...) but really, why offer up your fic and then say you don't care what we think? This is sort of a fic review site, you know.

Editorial comment #2: On that note, the adjectives "famous" and "popular" and "well-liked" mean very little to us as a description of a fic. (see: site description)

Editorial comment #3: By the way, you'll notice that none of the ficbitches has really honestly attacked RPS or RPF fandom. We just say the WRITING is often shitty. We haven't even touched the issue of whether it's right or wrong or whether RPS'ers are going to hell or whether people who hate RPS are just narrow-minded bigots who are unwilling to have their viewpoints expanded. (I personally love that last one. Yes, let's all take our fandom very seriously, people.) Please keep that in mind, all right?

Some time ago, Gunstar Heroine reviewed a J-Rock RPS (real-person-slash) fic. Part of the responses to that fic were along the lines of, "Well, of course you're going to dislike BAD RPS, there's lots of good RPS!"

As one of the people who thinks that all RPS is terrible crap, I took that advice to heart and went searching for good RPS. I went to about a dozen rec pages and read their suggestions for RPS. I asked friends who were into RPS. I read actorfic, musicianfic, boyband slash - I read a lot of it. I did my research.

I have yet to read RPS that doesn't make me want to stab my eyeballs out. Either the writing quality is poor, or the "characters" are uninteresting, or the storyline is completely retarded. "An AU where all the boyband members hang out at Skateland in junior high and everyone is gay!" I have read more retarded Eminem slash than I care to. Eminem x Lance Bass. Eminem x Sean Biggerstaff (no, I'm not kidding.) Lots of Eminem x Elijah Wood. Lance Bass x Orlando Bloom. Eminem x Lex Luthor. Eminem x QAF cast. Carson Daly brutally raping Justin Timberlake as a 17-year-old.

I *know* all of this is essentially braincandy, but can't it be INTERESTING braincandy? Most of the fics are essentially about how so-and-so is obsessed with Pixi Stix, so he gives them to his crush who doesn't understand the DEEP SIGNIFICANCE of the gesture, and the entire fic is their retarded attempts to reconcile and do the Humpty Dance. That level of infantile cutesy behavior that's excused because it's FAMOUS AND GAY behavior drives me up the wall, and it seems to be par for the course in RPF.

So, here comes my proposition. You people who claim that good RPS exists - prove it. Leave the link in the comments. I'll read it, and assuming I don't get dozens and dozens of replies, I'll reply with what I thought about it. (RPS and RPF - that is, non-slash, if it exists? are both welcome.) You non-RPS-fans are also welcome to read the fic and leave comments; just try to keep things succinct and fic-related. I'm the only one allowed to ramble for pages around here, dammit!

Go for it. Let's see if you can prove me wrong.

EDIT: What do I mean by "good"? A partial explanation. I'm not asking for realism, or even 100% feasibility, but I'm asking for an interesting story that isn't a madlibs slash story. If you read this thread about how Vivi's LOTR smutfest broke my mind and soul and I compared it to those soul-breaking Depeche Mode slashfics, I realized that the similarities extend far beyond their ability to reduce me to incoherency.

I realized that it was because YOU COULD EASILY INTERCHANGE THE NAMES.

big mean manipulative abusive seme or "top" or "dom": dave gahan/viggo/sean bean
weepy wussy uke who needs serious deep-dicking the seme's "love": martin gore/orlando/elijah
everyone else: held at bay, because either they love the seme and he's too much of a manwhore for them...or they love the uke, and big jealous psycho seme won't allow that.

It's very sad if a fic remains the same whether the cast of lord of the rings or the members of depeche mode are subbed in. That's not a good fic.

That's just an example of what I mean by "bad characterization." In general, people write these real people as brain-dead morons whose sole identifying characteristics are who they want to fuck and how they want to do it. Or they're weepy and whiny and co-dependent like Uke-Wan Kenobi of Star Wars fandom fame. I come out of the fic literally knowing nothing more about this "character" than they like to be tied up and paddled, or they have abandonment issues that allow their "lover/master/owner" to shamelessly abuse them.


So before you excuse all the sins of fandom, both RPF and regular fiction, with "what the hell do you expect, realism? these are just our fantasies" - naw, that's not what I mean at all. Reread what I said.

A boring, incomprehensible, unrealistic RPS fic is like a boring, incomprehensible, unrealistic Mary Sue. Sure, it's your personal fantasy. But don't be surprised if I'm bored shitless by it or say it's badly-written. Muses and Soulbonds are not exempt from the need for editing and plotting.